Introducing our family

As all of you know, Steve and I are just Steve and I at the moment. However, we do have one thing we look after, and that is our amazing plant, Caesar. His full name is actually Caesar Side Salad. My mother gave him to us for Christmas in 2006, and I named him Caesar Side Salad to let him know he had no chance for survival. I am not a plant person. I am really not a plant person. I love to look at plants, but they tend to die the moment they come into my keeping. Funny, considering I grew up on a working farm.

When we got him Caesar had just a few leaves and maybe one eight inch tendril. We lived in Pocatello, Idaho, at the time, which didn't help him. The air in Pocatello is very dry. I kept him watered and he stayed on our kitchen table, attracting bugs and dirt, but hey! what we do for our kids. Somehow he stayed alive and kept growing.

When we moved to Columbus, Caesar exploded. The humidity in Ohio is many times what it was in Pocatello, and Caesar definitely approved. Despite getting watered less than the cacti in Arizona, Caesar has flourished until he has been making some attempts to conquer our living room. The kitchen table is now safe, fortunately, because he is bigger than it. Now he sits above our stereo, getting very little sunlight, and is happy as a clam. Or a long plant.

Anyway, from the very beginning we tried to wage pyschological warfare against Caesar. Somehow he has survived the longest odds. Steve asked me this morning when the last time I watered him was, and I was able to truthfully say, only a week ago. Of course, before that the last time was about a month previous.

To anyone who is like me, unable to care for plants, yet wants something green and leafy in your house, get a plant like Caesar. He is able to withstand nuclear missiles, I suspect, and doesn't require much natural sunlight. And for those of you who are not like me, please don't stage a plant humane society uprising against me. I promise I'll get around to watering him . . . very soon!